A while ago, could be 3 or so years, I was in my local fish and chip shop. For those who don't know, there are small take away food shops in the UK (and I guess else where) and generally you wander up, order your food, then usually wait a few minutes while your order is put together or cooked. 10 mins or so. (I like the wait because usually it means my food is being cooked fresh.)
Usually I stand to the side waiting, and just gaze around, usually at the world going by out side the window. Normally the customers are not just one off people, but a couples or a pair of friends, or a parent and kids, and so on. You know, a decent variety of however people come. Usually there is a bit of a buzz of conversation and what not.
This time, I looked up, and all 10 or so of the people waiting in the show were literally buried, absorbed in their smart phones, and the shop stood stark silence. The people on their own, the kids, the parents, the couples, the whole damn lot. The only sounds were of the people working in the shop preparing the food.
Usually when the food is cooked, the person behind the counter only needs to mention the beginning of the order and the right person usually snaps in to action to retrieved their food, and leave the shop. This time I noticed it took up to 3 or 4 attempts before the smart phone spell was broken and the person realized their food was ready.
And the weirdest thing was, as they came to, coming out of their smart phone spell, each and every one of them had that look of some one who had just woken up in the morning. Eyes blinking, rubbing eyes, the slow realization of where you are, what you are doing, what comes next, etc.
I found the whole thing incredible creepy.
And since then, I've seen it more and more. In fact, I have even been round people houses or in a pub, where there are a few people meeting up, and I've observed the exact same thing. Oh, add to that, railway stations, bus stops, and so on.
OK, smart phones are very, very useful. Great little devices. But Im not so sure about they way people use them. Seems to me there must be something socially damaging about over use. Its like having the kid who is (exaggerate to show the point time) 24/7 in his/her bedroom on their computer. Now its like that but we can take the computer everywhere. Yeah, we can isolate ourselves anywhere.
This is part of the reason why I obnoxiously refuse to get a smartphone. My phone is still the cheapest Nokia phone I could get.
The social behaviour they generate is interesting on every front. For instance, there's this shopping mall close to the center of the city where I live. On the last floor, there are a bunch of restaurants, a small tobacco shop and the toilets. I go there fairly often, either for the tobacco or to hit the toilet.
Every restaurant has incredibly pushy promoters; the moment you set foot on that floor, these people immediately start handing you flyers, telling you about their restaurant, following you a couple of steps. I do my best to be polite with them; I know they're working on next to no payment, for imbecile bosses who think this is a good sales technique, so I'm never rude with them or anything. I just smile and say "Yeah, maybe some other time".
Sometimes, however, I'm just not in the mood for that. Long days, my own retarded boss, the incredible urge to go to the toilet (for some reason, there's no toilet around the place...), my hurry to get home and, until about a year ago, a lingering depression, simply mean I'm sometimes not up even to the little human interaction I need in order to politely refuse them.
So I just pop up my phone and pretend I'm reading a message or dialing a number. Suddenly, everyone's OK. No one would even dare disturb me. If I pretend I'm talking on the phone, the pushier ones will apologize for disturbing me, but will otherwise eagerly present me their offering. But if I have my eyes buried in it, it's like I'm suddenly invisible. One time, I even had to wait there for one of my friends to arrive, and stood there for at least five or ten minutes. No one even approached me as long as I kept my eyes down. I put the phone in my pocket for like five seconds because I thought I'd lost my wallet -- poof, two chicks appear to invite me to the marvelous restaurant that just opened and has a special offer just for me.
I think I would excuse this behavior in large cities, or when you feel overexposed to stimulation. I mean, it DOES take a ton of effort to be attentive to every single human that you encounter, whether it's in an mundane setting like a subway/shopping mall, or at work. Especially if you live in a huge city like SF, or NYC.
If you don't distract yourself once in awhile, by immersing yourself with something like a smartphone, I imagine it's very easy to get drained out with so much stimulation.
I mean, if we lived in the caveman age, or even the medieval ages where we encountered the same 20 or so people every single day, then yes, there's no need for the smartphone, but in the modern day, I think it's almost necessary to survive mentally. I look at it this way: Humans were not meant to live in highly populated areas where they interact with a thousand strangers every single day.
So true. I'm extremely sensitive to my surroundings, so I find that the only way to comfortably be around lots of people is by having something that keeps me focused. This is usually my phone, sometimes a book, and occasionally a podcast (both of which could be on my phone).
That said, I really hate this new phenomenon, so my solution to this is to have a smartphone, but no internet. As a result, when I do employ my device as a way to avoid being overstimulated, the 'distraction' is at least of some quality, be it a long-form Instapaper article, a chapter of a book, or a podcast that spends an hour on a single topic.
It's not perfect, and I still put my phone away whenever I can handle my surroundings, but it works.
It would. I've actually considered it and warmly recommend it to anyone who can. It's not an option for me due to personal reasons, but if I could do it, I wouldn't wait a single minute.
Rocking my nokia n95. I refuse to pay for SMS that should be free (requires less data to be transmitted than voice call). I don't like to text anyway, I'd prefer to call people.
So yes, overuse is not healthy. But consider another angle: for me a smartphone can fill useless time like waiting for an appointment, the bus, etc. instead of wasting their time these people text their loved ones, read articles about self employment or check reddit for cat pictures.
Giving someone not the attention they might deserve is indeed rude. But i hope customs will change hopefully to the better and people put their smartphones down when appropriate.
But i don't think it is right other without knowing the context and what they're doing.
Edit:
I think i want a better mute button for my phone and a hardware mute button for my laptop. Everything should be hidden besides calls from circa 5 people and the third call from one number. Besides that the OS should not show me any notification, message,etc. not even the notification light should blink and when i check the time on the phone i should not see how many messages i missed
Try eating dinner with a group of current college kids and hoping they put their phones down to listen to you.
There is no way the trend is going to reverse itself. I try not to be a cynic but on this topic it's impossible for me - what event could trigger a reversal to this behavior?
What would make people prefer people again over digital distractions?
They are socializing with people, but physical presence matters less than it used to. They're not (mostly) playing games. They're generally chatting with their friends, or (if they're really bored) browsing content posted by a smallish list of facebook and twitter contacts.
To trigger a reversal, you have to train people to be engaged, sympathetic, good at body language, and extremely talkative. Basically all the difficult interpersonal things that text chat can't do. Edit: technology isn't standing still, though! Snapchat is adding more personal video content to phones already.
'physical presence matters less than it used to.'
Physical presence matters just as much as it always did, what's lacking is the appreciation of how much is being missed.
If a smile from a stranger can cheer you up, imagine being surrounded by familiar voices each giving you a friendly "hi" and then moving on. It's not especially meaningful but it's a great feeling. Maybe it's more valuable than the option of actually connecting with whoever happens to be physically present.
"Maybe it's more valuable than the option of actually connecting with whoever happens to be physically present."
That's where you and I disagree. Given the choice of minimal connections with those you know and fuller connections with those you don't know, I tend to prefer the latter.
Perhaps it helps to think about it like this. Everyone has something interesting about them, and whilst you might not like everyone you meet, you can at least learn something from them. Openness to meeting new people is a very positive thing (in my opinion).
I agree wholeheartedly with your sentiment. As a former anti-social-randian-nerd, I used to shun social interactions in favor of reading. But guess what? You can learn a whole lot of things just by having an honest conversation with a stranger. And despite the stress of initially approaching a stranger (and the few times your attempts get embarrassingly shot down), I would say that its worth it.
I was reflecting for a bit on why it made me feel better to be good at conversations. Maybe its the way society is set up. Or maybe I have genes which are the result of generations of my ancestors being social (which may have a very tangible benefit if you're living in a pre-modern society)
For many introverts, you'd prefer not to interact with those you don't know well - in an usual social setting you are already getting more interaction than you want/need, and any extra is unpleasant and unwelcome. You can use a phone not as a distraction, but as a (currently) socially acceptable excuse to avoid interaction.
I mean, if someone you barely know wants to make smalltalk, it's generally not okay to tell them to fsck off, even if you'd prefer to be left alone, social norms are generally made by and for extroverts. But being "in phone" and ignoring them works - and if you can use it to connect with the few people you want to connect with, it's a plus.
But here's the thing, you've associated conversation with awkwardness and banality. Neither of those are intrinsic qualities of conversation, it's quite possible to have just the opposite, if you want to and know how to. The key is being comfortable in your own skin, and that's a great quality to have, both for yourself and for others, and both for those with introverted tendencies and extroverted tendencies.
If small talk annoys you (and I totally understand why it does), consider its function. It's meant to be an ice breaker, not the focus of an entire conversation (unless there's no time for anything else).
But the whole point is that it's quite likely that I don't want that conversation. As you say "it's possible .. if you want to". Usually I'd prefer to just continue thinking whatever I was thinking before someone initiated that conversation, the interruption was unwelcome, and I'd be glad if it hadn't happened - i.e., if (s)he had looked at me and decided for whatever reason (such as a phone) that I don't want to be talked to right now.
Being capable and comfortable in such conversations is very, very useful in life (correlates with all kinds of life 'success' measures), and it can be acquired, and acquiring it requires a lot of such practice. However, even with all that, the preference doesn't change - if you are an introvert, you then can do it very well, but you'd still rather prefer not to do it.
For smalltalk - it's likely that I don't want to break that ice; I don't want more friends - I don't have enough free weekends/evenings to spend with my existing great friends, as we've all grown more busy, gotten families and moved miles apart; starting new relationships would decrease quality of existing ones. I don't want to meet hot girls - I'm happily married. I don't want to get to know a random person - if we meet on business, I'd rather keep that a purely professional relationship. If I'm in a mood to meet people and new experiences, say, while traveling - then great; but if I've spent all my "communications batteries" already today - then unless we're very close, I'd rather not have any unneccessary meaningful communications.
I agree conversational skills are 'useful' (if you wish to frame them in terms of functionality), and agree that ability to converse doesn't necessarily alter preference for introversion/extroversion. I disagree that being able to hold a good conversation requires a lot of practice, again I would say it's down to being comfortable in your own skin, but an option for getting that comfortable can be through talking with others.
Speaking personally, throughout my life I've had times when I've been extroverted and times when I've been introverted, and I think both are great. Introverts get to enjoy a rich inner life, and extroverts get to enjoy a vibrant outer life, there's something to be said for both, but best of all is not being restricted from experiencing either (easier said than done).
Just to further our discussion, I'm curious to know what you think about the difference between online and offline conversation, for introverts especially. Does one feel easier than the other, and if so, why do you think that is?
> They're generally chatting with their friends, or (if they're really bored) browsing content posted by a smallish list of facebook and twitter contacts
I don't think that's true, in my experience they are sometimes chatting with their friends but mostly compulsively browsing social network content, and that content is the most shallow boring crap you can imagine (pictures of food, funny cat pictures, blah blah, we all know the content I mean).
Maybe we are just experiencing a transitional (decades?) phase en route to living entirely in the virtual realm. Do people in Second Life walk around looking at their phones?
Something similar I saw in Second Life that I found interesting was people reading comic books - you can get comic books that hover in front of your character's face that you can look at by going into first person, and other players can see the pages too.
The hacker community has clearly created software that masses of people find incredibly useful and worthwhile. How is that success something to be compared to a cocaine addiction? Have you heard stories about people trading sexual favors for 20 more megabytes when their data has run out?
I didn't compare smartphone addiction to cocaine addiction, which wrecks and ends lives.
I do think, however, that something can be incredibly useful and worthwhile and still have some negative effects. Everything in moderation and all that. I believe that, in time (many years), people will figure out what these effects are and how to avoid them, just like (to oversimplify) one can enjoy wine without any ill effect.
Most teenagers are self-absorbed little snots so I don't think blaming the phone is fair.
This is not a "trend." Smartphones are still a very new technology and there is a gap between the changes they have made in our lives and the development of proper etiquette.
Yes yes, our youth is rotten to the core. Even more than the previous one and the one before.
I think, understanding a new technology does not stop with technical details.
We have to understand want this technology means to other people.
The author talks about "real connections with the people around us", but how is a message I send to someone on the other end of the world unreal?
If children send 3000 to 4000 messages a day, if true, you could describe this as a deep investment in communication and connections, but just not according to his definitions.
I grew up in a culture where television was rather 'new'. Whenever we visited people, they would actually turn the television on. On the other hand, in my home culture the tv has been a presence for decades, and somewhere along the way we've decided that it is rude to turn on the tv when you have visitors.
Now I am assuming that the situation in my home culture was similar when tv was new. I'm not at all certain about that.
I mostly agree with you, but I would argue that 'useless time' is far from useless. Boredom is important and valuable, and, as has often been mentioned in discussions like these, the value of 'useless time' is evident when you consider how many good ideas are a result of long showers, other bathroom activities, or periods of sustained 'disconnect'.
"This time, I looked up, and all 10 or so of the people waiting in the show were literally buried, absorbed in their smart phones, and the shop stood stark silence. The people on their own, the kids, the parents, the couples, the whole damn lot."
Little bit of a shameless plug, and I apologize, but I wrote a piece recently about how this phenomenon is starting to have some very interesting effects in public places (supermarkets, for instance):
Everywhere I go, I see the same thing: people's heads buried in their phones. I hear the same thing: the continual pitter-patter of push notifications and texting. It is indeed creepy, but it's the new normal. And I wonder what things will look and sound like when wearable devices become the new normal.
Endless stimulation and distraction -- whether from phones, from idle web surfing, etc. -- might have some really bad consequences for the brain. It turns out that the brain is unable to clear its cache, so to speak, when it's in a state of constant stimulation.
Have you seen the short film called "I Forgot my Phone" (http://youtu.be/OINa46HeWg8)? It deals with exactly this subject and has a great surreal creepy vibe.
Made me think about how many times I've been that blinking person who didn't hear their food order, which I dislike but keep doing.
Its like people don't experience life through their own eyes any more. Even though they are right there, they prefer to watch it on their portable small screen.
I don't see a problem here. I don't recommend we give our children a smartphone and allow them unlimited usage, but if a bunch of adults are standing around looking at their phone while waiting on take-out, who cares? Did everyone sit around in in-depth discussions with strangers before? I remember people would sit and read the newspaper or a book or stare into space while waiting.
3-4 times to get someone's attention for every person, or did it happen once? Could have easily happened if they were reading their Arthur C. Clarke novels as well.
When I started college in 2008 I remember almost always being able to talk a cute girl or at least another person on the bus.
When I finished in 2013 (switched majors and studied in France so 5 years it was) that happened incredibly rarely. It's hard to talk to someone when they have head phones in or are buried in some sort of game and almost every single person had their headphones in.
Even a book I can casually ask what some one is reading when they look up.
No smart phone for me thank you kindly. Even when I hang out with friends I occasionally experience moments where everyone but me is just staring at their phones. Then I wonder why I'm hanging out there. It's weird.
Ever think that they do this so they don't have to talk to you? While on bus or waiting, I've used the book/phone/etc as an excuse to ignore someone that I KNEW was waiting for conversation with ANYONE. My mindset- "I don't know you, I don't care what your selling, I don't care if you think I'm pretty- your not getting a date, I'm not here to entertain you"
I got at least a few dates and made a few friends on the bus for sure. I never bothered people who were obviously doing something. By the end it was impossible to find people who were just riding the bus was the point of the post as opposed to doing something.
Is that the world we should strive to live in where no one can make connections randomly and without prior introduction?
If you're not busy, and I'm not busy, what's the big deal with talking to someone?
And not only that but is everyones 9,000th run of temple run worth a society of people who have no ability to communicate outside of pre setup social scenarios?
Why wouldn't you? They're people. They generally have decades of experiences you've never had. They're extremely faceted and interesting. If someone doesn't want to talk to you you accept that and move on but most people are extremely interesting and can teach you something. How can you ignore some of the most valuable sources of interesting information in the world?
Maybe they don't want to talk to me. I accept that and move on.
It's called taking an extremely small risk for the chance that you can gain a friend or even just have an interesting conversation you'd never have had. Everyone's worth listening to.
The really funny part about your question to me is that you're talking to a stranger over the internet but you're having trouble understanding why you'd want to talk to a person in real life.
How do you know they have interesting information for you? While you take the loss of them not wanting to talk, do you think the rudeness/inconsideration of talking to them uninvited? Yeah asking for directions is one thing but interrupting their life for a stranger?
Note: from the point of view of someone that has social anxiety and avoids social activities, phone calls and verbal interaction as much as possible.
I wasn't interrupting their lives. If someone was alone on the bus not doing anything, or alone in the Tim Horton's line not doing anything, I'd say "hello". If they responded we'd start talking. If they were clearly not interested in talking to me then we wouldn't talk.
Most people truly enjoy talking to people. Most people have anxiety about meeting new people and remembering names and talking to people on the phone. But once they've gotten past the "hello" most people absolutely love to talk. I generally ask questions more than talk myself because I already know how I think and would like to hear other's perspectives.
And how could someone who has lived for decades not have something interesting to say?
It's not only about interesting information though, it's about developing social skills and the ability to interact with others in situations that aren't pre set up. It's about meeting new people. It's about understanding that every person is interesting. It's about realizing no one in the damn Tim Horton's line is doing anything better than making a new friend or having a conversation with someone they've never met whose views might open up a new way of thinking for them. It's about meeting people from other cultures and countries with different customs and life styles. It's about meeting the girl that could be the love of your life one day. In the end it's about living and interacting with the single most interesting thing around you at any given point. Other people. Far more multi-dimensional than any piece of artwork or app on a phone could ever be are the people around you.
You seem to think I was a huge bother to these people but one girl's first kiss ever was me because I said "hello" to her in the Tim Horton's line. She truly enjoyed the experience and while we didn't go much further than that that's a memory neither of us will ever forget. Would it have been better for me to be doing a fantasy draft with the espn app on my phone? Not a chance.
Were there times people didn't want to talk to me? Totally. But the majority of people are very friendly and open to talking to people if you say "hello". You can't be a creep with some pick up line. You have to genuinely be interested in learning more about the person. Then you tend to learn a lot and make new connections.
And again it wasn't something I did every bus ride. But it's nice to have the option every now and again to get a little jittery and say "hello" to someone you don't know. No one has no social anxiety, or at least I don't have zero social anxiety.
Hey as long as you're happy tekalon keep doing what you're doing. But if you're a little lonely, try saying hello to someone on the bus one day ;-).
And always remember, every single person in your life right now was a stranger at one point.
In my experience it's much easier to strike up a conversation with a random person in a college town, regardless of what they're doing at the time, than outside of one. I'm not entirely sure why, but it's a very distinct pattern I've observed in multiple places in the US.
Oh good point. There is something sort of acceptable about seeing some one reading and interrupting in a nice way to inquire about the book. Is it acceptable to see some one on their smart phone and inquiring about what they are looking at?
Hmm, you know I suppose it probably is totally acceptable to do that. What weirds me out is the fact that so many things on smart phones are totally personal including texts, e-mails, accounts for things like facebook. Also the inclusion of headphones into the mix makes everything a lot more difficult.
Which also says something in a way... if the brain can only really do one task at a time[1], and in every down time moment people (and these are the down time moments, after classes or work, or whatever else they were engaged in) they're both listening to music and juggling between a bunch of different apps on their phone... just curious about the implications to the psyche.
When I started college in 1999 I remember talking to cute girls at a party when we were both there to socialize, not on the bus interrupting her book to find out what she was reading.
Yes. I remember talking to people at parties as well when we were both there to socialize.
Maybe you have trouble meeting people when you're not formally introduced is the issue.
I didn't really tend to ask people what they were reading unless they had clearly stopped reading. I guess that was a bad aspect of that post. But when people have headphones on they never take them off at all. People do put books down occasionally and stop reading however.
"3-4 times to get someone's attention for every person, or did it happen once? Could have easily happened if they were reading their Arthur C. Clarke novels as well."
I've seen many signs in restaurants asking patrons not to use the phone while they are waiting. So, I'm guessing it's often enough to be a problem.
I seriously doubt that. Most times I see that it refers to using your phone as a phone so as not to disturb other people. I would guess it doesn't prohibit people from reading or web surfing.
I was traveling on the metro in Korea late one night. There were maybe 20 people in the train car, and literally every single one was staring down at their smart phone. I had to laugh, there wasn't a single exception and not a word spoken, as new people got on, sat down, and pulled out their phone. This went on for 10 or 20 minutes, then finally someone made a noise. It was a women pointing to her screen to share something with a friend next to her. Then they both went back to their separate phones and the mobile train continued forward.
This was the first time I noticed everyone on their phone, and I felt like I was in the twilight zone. There would be groups of three or four friends sitting in a line, not speaking a single word. Eerie.
Given that metros and elevators are the kind of public private spaces where the social norm is to ignore the people around you as much as possible (at least, in most mass transit cultures I'm familiar with) this long predates the smart phone and the cell phone.
When I lived in Seoul in 2008-2010, people were not only using smartphones, they were watching television on their smartphones, in the subway. Smartphones in Korea have built-in TV tuners.
And yes, the social norm is and has been to ignore the people around you as much as possible, even more so in East Asian cultures, and more so when it's very crowded. If everyone were talking and socializing, it would be very loud in the subway car.
In many populated cities, talking on the subway/train/etc is considered extremely rude.
It changes from culture to culture, but I think it'd be weird if they didn't do something with their time since being talkative or social isn't an option. Instead of carrying around a book or sudoku puzzle everywhere for such situations, people just use their phone.
Heh, this is definitely a trend everywhere. Thankfully, it doesn't affect me because I hate small screens. I don't know why, I used to sink into my smartphone just like you described but these days I just get angry if I try to do anything on a sub 10-inch.
In fact touch screens on the go are pure hell - I try to take a photo, I touch the wrong part of the screen, use the flashlight, turn it off accidentally, try to edit a note, scroll or edit it in the wrong place, gah!
Nope, its a very first world problem. If you bring this "phone everywhere" behavior to third world countries, you'll be jacked on your first day here, no lie.
"And the weirdest thing was, as they came to, coming out of their smart phone spell, each and every one of them had that look of some one who had just woken up in the morning. Eyes blinking, rubbing eyes, the slow realization of where you are, what you are doing, what comes next, etc."
I bet the same would happen if they had a book or magazine and were reading or even just staring off into space and daydreaming or watching TV. Change of context.
When I await my order being prepared I look outside window and observe people, cars, interactions and sometimes it takes for staff to call me several times for me to come back to realization where I am.
Other times I just go into sort of dreamworld of mine, I start to think about anything and block external signals, this shields me more from outside world than looking outside window. Of course I need to be pulled out from this state.
I do not have smartphone, tablet and I do not read leaflets, papers while waiting.
I think part of this trend has to do with the fact that many people tend to have fear/anxiety issues, when they have nothing to do. We have lost the capability to truly relax, even to bore ourselves. When we are not active, we worry, so we constantly distract ourselves from these feelings of anxiety.
Another example - a few years ago there was a huge trend of housewives playing Hidden-image games. It turns out that these games were so simple that people could do them in parallel with other tasks such as being on the phone, but they created a level of 'noise' that kept them from worrying about their lives. It's quasi electronic self-medication.
I think that a good deal of that fear/anxiety comes from the fact that people are expected to be more productive. If someone doesn't respond to an email immediately, we think the are not working or are being lazy.
I've recently noticed that I will often think about and come up with a solution to an issue at work while driving or eating dinner. I suspect this happens because I'm not being distracted by the problem. It also bothers me a little. If I worked in a factory assembling widgets, I would not be able to take my work home. You can't leave your brain at work if your job is mostly mental work.
> You can't leave your brain at work if your job is mostly mental work.
Trust me, you can. I simply ignore emails after 6pm. I will look at them first thing at 8am the next day, but not after 6. If someone presses you on it and they won't take "I have a life" for an answer, just lie and say you didn't see it or that you were at your kid's baseball game. I suspect that the frequency of someone's boss actually getting pissed that they did not respond right away to a 9pm email to be extremely low. In the unlikely occurrence that you actually work in an environment like this, I suggest polishing up the resume, because there are plenty of jobs out there that do not require your brain 24/7.
I do the same and while I do get away with it, it's not appreciated at all by those people who sleep with their phone in their hand. I get crap about it all the time and if I was an employee I would be very concerned about that habit affecting my career path.
All that said, there's no way in hell I'm changing this. If something is urgent I will get a text or even a phone call. Everything else is always important but not urgent and people just refuse to think about the difference.
I think that a good deal of that fear/anxiety comes from the fact that people are expected to be more productive. If someone doesn't respond to an email immediately, we think the are not working or are being lazy.
A quick but possibly meaningless e-mail response doesn't constitute productivity. The expectation you describe is just one of availability (or working), while ignoring productivity or presenting real solutions.
Unfortunately, enough, well, for the lack of a more elegant term, MBA leeches, have climbed the corporate ladder high enough to generalize equating the vague term "proactivity" (which tends to involve permanent availability, diligence and so much pseudo-politeness that it starts smelling a lot like ass-kissing) to productivity.
This is particularly annoying when it's augmented by unrealistic expectations, like "you're a programmer... you spend all your time on a computer, can't you check your inbox"?
I used to work in a place where this was common practice, especially among the HR and sales drones. They pissed me off so hard that I cracked up and explained one particularly pushy tie-wearer that I only check my mail every hour or so, when I take a break from, you know, work, and if something is more urgent than that, he can come to my office. He obnoxiously explained me that a lot of his work involves remote communication and he can't just go all the way to my office (which was otherwise on the same floor), so I just went like, ok, prioritize or whatever your newspeak language calls it and leave me the fuck alone.
I stubbornly enforced my "one e-mail checking each hour" until the whole department started doing it. To everyone's surprise, things went a lot more smoothly; instead of hurriedly replying some half-thought obvious crap just to show the boss how attentive you are to your work, you could actually take five minutes and explain the guy what he needed to know. Much fewer details slipped and everyone was eventually happier, save for the self-important rookies who thought Skyping and placing phone calls was the substance of their work.
Under average circumstances I have to drive about 50 minutes from my house to my office. This past winter we were expecting a bad storm one evening. Being a hardworker, I took home stuff to work on if I got stuck and couldn't make it into the office.
Just before I got home that evening one of my tires blew. I called the manager I was working for and explained the situation. I was planning on getting the tire replaced first thing. The tire shop didn't have internet, but I had plenty of paper work that didn't require internet, so I could work at the shop. And of course, I would call him as soon as the tire was fixed.
Next morning the storm had settled over our area. I limped to the tire store. It took about 1.5 hours for them to replace the tire (they had to wait on delivery of the tire from their supply house). When they had replaced it I called the manager and let him know I was en route. Unfortunately, a couple of exits down the road a tire related emergency light came on.
So, I turned around and headed back to the shop. En route I saw a large accident happen on the road I had just traversed. As soon as I got to the shop, I called the manager. I explained the current situation, and suggested that I just continue to work from the tire shop and when they were done I could work from home.
Long story short, this "productivity focused" manager insisted (i.e., I would be fired if I did otherwise) that I drive down to the office. I ended up spending 2.5 hours stuck in winter storm traffic, so that I could sit for an hour at a desk in an office to do paperwork that I could have done at home. Of course, I then had to turn around and drive back (thankfully that only took 2 hours).
So instead of 3.5 hours of productivity I got 4.5 of completely wasted drive time for 1 hour of actual work. (Then there's the fact that if I'm on a work roll at home, I tend not to stop, so he would have likely gotten more than just the 3.5 hours of work out of me.) All because his idea of 'work' is that someone in a seat in an office is productive while someone at home can't possible be productive.
I'm now much more punctual about working as close to 40 hours/weekly on the dot as I possibly can (I used to average many more hours).
I won't do more than cursory email checks from home.
And, I don't care how productive I am when I'm actually at the office.
Because clearly all that actually matters is that I'm physically there.
As the current generation replaces boomers, and hopefully comes to their senses, maybe we'll see a shift from "butt-in-chair-time" to actual output as the primary metric for productivity.
Available is indeed a key word. If someone is able to work from a connected location anywhere in the world, and they're at a connected location, are they available?
There are certainly some occupations, and some aspects of other occupations, that require a person to be at a very specific place at a very specific time (e.g. emergency room personnel). But there are also many, many jobs that do not inherently have a location and/or temporal requirement for the work to be successfully completed.
So my question to employers is whether it is more important for (a) work to be effectively completed within given time constraints or (b) employees to have a physical presence, particularly when the two are at odds (e.g., storm prevents someone from getting to work location, but the person can effectively work from their current location)?
Usually encountering problem and not solving it almost instantly, I switch to something else, switch off from original problem, come back few minutes later, either fix it instantly or go away again.
Stop thinking about thinking, that is one of greatest issues.
well, you edited most out, but anyway.
I often get criticized because i don't answer to stuff on my phone "instantly". Sometimes it takes me a couple of hours because i set it to alert me only on very important stuff (this happens more or less, never).
I don't like to check it very often (because it breaks concentration on whatever i'm doing and that annoys me..).
So anyway, the point is, i understand that even if you don't like, or don't want to be distracted, the social pressure makes it hard. Direct social pressure "check your phone i sent the msg FIVE minutes ago!!"
That's around the point when I explain that the phone is for my convenience, not theirs.
Or... That's what I'd like to say anyway..
In reality, I do feel that social pressure to respond -- hell, I even feel guilty if I don't respond at all (which is ridiculous!). The problem is that I sometimes let my "triage" habits from email slip over into my text handling. For instance, I'll receive a text and actually instantly open it, but upon gauging its "importance" in the context of other activities (usually work) I'll mentally file it under "deal with later," and go back to what I'm doing. And, of course, being that text messages don't have anything approaching the organization of email, I usually end up forgetting to ever write people back all together.
I sure wish there was a "mark unread" function for texts on Android.. It'd make me seem a lot less of a anti-social dick.
Several times, this article mentions the notion - without really explaining it - that we have "anxiety of being understimulated."
I think I understand what the author means, but I'm not sure that's quite right. I agree with the main points that the author is making, but I wonder if this "culture of distraction" is really a symptom of an even larger problem. Consider the possibility that many of us are simply highly anxious just about all of the time, and that the distractions presented by wired life are things we seek out for relief on purpose. That is, that the distractions aren't the cause of the anxiety, but a symptom.
Maybe checking in with Twitter over and over again isn't "stimulation," maybe it's more like a narcotic. It helps us block out genuine, serious anxieties about money, jobs, work, family, and the future in general with easily-digested, glittery trivia.
One possible reason to think about the problem this way - although it may sound like a big change in subject at first - is antidepressant sales, which have been climbing for years and now stand at record levels. Clearly, for whatever reason, we've built a way of life for ourselves that leaves a huge percentage of us desperately unhappy and stressed out for an awful lot of the time.
Perhaps the explosion of smartphones and tablets, of portable, pocketable "brain stimulation" is, for many people, a form of self-medication. When you have a moment of downtime, and you have a chance to think about just how screwed you and your family are if your name comes up in this next round of layoffs, you can instead reach in your pocket and check out the latest celebrity scandal. When a free moment strikes and you find yourself wondering what sort of fascist nightmare future-US your children are going to be stuck with, you can instead check out the latest shiny aspirational gadgets.
Regardless of the cause, the "culture of distraction" is still a real phenomenon worth fighting, I think. But maybe we can fight it more successfully if we understand the causes more completely.
I always thought of it as more about escapism than anxiety of being under stimulated although I guess it's a small difference. Compulsively distracting yourself stops you from thinking about aspects of your life that stress you out or worry you.
I just recently changed my habits around this a bit and with hindsight I really agree with the narcotic/self-medication comparison.
Good point, it can be a symptom of something larger. I think with ubiquitous communications and globalization, the world is just more competitive. This is very stressful, and can cause anxiety and depression.
Anecdote: I was just playing board games with my friends the other night. After 1.5 hours, I started panicking and feeling anxiety, so I excused myself. It felt wrong I guess, taking that much time off of work/study. Someone else might be outdoing me, right? Heh. I gotta say, I definitely didn't get this a decade ago.
For anyone who feels similar sometimes, it's important to develop methods to bring your mental state to something more manageable. I like to remind myself that even if this is true, the anxiety feelings aren't going to help me "compete" anyways, so might as well be calm and move on.
Immediately thought of the same Louis CK bit from Conan.
Pascal's quote is revealing and shows that this problem is by no means a recent invention. Though I would wager that new technology has made it much, much easier to quickly distract ourselves from idleness.
I knew someone would beat me to this. :) Even as an introvert, I rarely have moments of sadness and loneliness like this any more. I kind of miss that, and enjoy it when one does sneak its way into my life. It's really hard to regularly decide to leave the phone and "do nothing" over "doing something", even though we probably all know that the thing we're doing with our phone was really not that important.
This post is dripping with irony because it is, itself, a form of distraction. Why? Because it doesn't offer any objective evidence for it's assertions. It is prescriptive distraction, a kind of modern, well-meaning form of muckraking that is a kind of politically passive aggressive post-apocalyptic self-help piece. (Don't get me wrong, I love writing these sorts of things as much as the next guy, but I keep them in my private journal.)
The older I get the more skeptical I feel about any of my own attitudes that I don't have clear objective evidence for, especially the kind of vague forebodings that motivate this sort of piece. There are entire "hidden worlds" out there, where people are motivated by completely different things. "Ours is a culture of distraction." Which culture? There are so many cultures in the world, and even in the US, and even in Silicon Valley.
Yes, I too see people walking around with their eyes downcast at their phones, consumed by far-away happenings. And it certainly feels like "we" are more disconnected from each other. But these are feelings, and should be treated as an impetus to look more deeply into the fact of the matter, rather than rush to diagnose and treat an ailment which you don't understand on any objective scale. And indeed, the first and best place to start looking is within yourself, and within your own life. Because the flip side to recognizing any kind of pan-cultural doom is living the alternative. That's the really cool thing about culture, is that it is not enforced by law, you can indeed break from it in very meaningful ways.
An article documenting your experience breaking from the culture, with the implicit message that you found something lacking and went on a search to find it, would be far more valuable than subjective analysis. Because, as fun as your subjective analysis is to read, without action it is merely distraction.
I battle with this and one thing that's been helping me a lot is "Letting It Cool". By that I mean that I delay reading "new" things until they've had a chance to lose their "newness".
I've found that newness is a false signal for value. Just because something is new, we tend to errantly assign extra value to it.
You can combat this by removing the new quality from the item by putting it somewhere where it can "cool down".
For me, I save all the articles I want to read for the weekend. I just email the articles to myself and they go in a special folder and that's where they cool off for a few days.
When you first start doing this, it is surprising how much some articles lose their perceived value over a few days. An article that I was really excited about when I first saw it will often induce a "meh" a few days later.
On the other hand, some articles still retain their value and appeal several days later.
I end up spending far fewer hours a week reading articles because of this method. It also helps to keep me focused since I don't let my mind wander to other topics during my work day.
This also works for other things like movies, tv shows, facebook, etc. If you want to see the true value of something, delay enjoying it until the newness has worn off. It helps reduce what you consume and increases the quality of what you do.
If your goal is to produce more and consume less, then this strategy can really help.
"Smoking has gone out. To be sure, it is a shocking thing, blowing smoke out of our mouths into other people's mouths, eyes, and noses, and having the same thing done to us. Yet I cannot account, why a thing which requires so little exertion, and yet preserves the mind from total vacuity, should have gone out. Every man has something by which he calms himself: beating with his feet, or so."
Samuel Johnson, quoted in Boswell's *Tour of the Hebrides", entry for August 19.
Since I was a kid I was known to quickly get bored, and then read something, annoying teachers. But back then I could sit still at home and make levels for my favourite games hours at end
Now since I got this goddmn.smartphone for professional reasons ( got phone in 2011, but work making smartphone games since 2008) I am getting more and more easily distracted and anxious, there was even a day recently that I spent the whole day looking at Facebook, Wikipedia, Wikis, tvtropes, hn, newspapers, and other random shit, and when it was time to go home, I noticed that I never even opened my IDE :(
The digitally tethered to work thing is a killer. I was very happy not having a smartphone and not having internet access in my home for a couple years recently. To use the internet I would get dressed and go to the apartment building lobby. This arrangement was very productive for me and calmed my mind. When I was in my apartment I had undisturbed focus. But professional demands required I get wired up. I quite dislike it.
Powerful stuff. I've noticed that my "long form" mental focus has gradually declined, I believe beginning from about the time I began using a smartphone a couple of years ago. It's now so bad that if I can't improve it through developing good habits, I'll be ditching the smart phone for a dumb one, and finding other ways to curtail short-form reading and internet browsing :)
A relevant plug: My brother and I are developing a web app to help with this problem of distractedness. It's a to-do list manager that encourages mindfulness by helping you monitor procrastination and training your ability to steadily focus. Launching sometime this fall: http://fleur.io
I've found two things can keep this at bay: reading old-school dead-tree books, and meditation.
I am an avid reader who is quite fussy about what he's reading. Everyone around me knows I read a lot, so of course what better present for my birthday than an e-reader, right?
Wrong. I can't use that stuff. It puts me in the Distracted Mode, whereas when I do serious reading, I need to be in the Focused Mode. E-stuff automatically flips on the Distracted switch. You know - the stumbleupon links, the reddit cats, the endless outpouring of youtube video mud. Old school books do the opposite.
Also, meditation is pretty much the polar opposite of twitter-driven thinking.
Things like The Long Now Foundation, and the book called Anathem by Neal Stephenson, are direct reactions and backlashes to the twitterification of the modern mind.
Scott Adams, author of Dilbert, wrote an interesting piece on this before. He argues that we've effectively eliminated boredom and that it really isn't a good thing. Why? Because bored people are compelled to do stuff, whether it be creative thinking or seeking out a new experience. When boredom relief is cheap and readily-available then we lose the need for these things.
My personally theory is, that this development has been going on for thousands of years. As we find better ways to deliver messages, e.g. horses, pigeons, telegraph, telephone, eMail, twitter, our time horizon has apparently been shrinking accordingly. Think about the cathedrals which took hundreds of years to build. The mindset that was required for such undertakings seems almost alien now.
The person making the decision didn't actually have to work on the thing for a hundred years. If you think of them buying their way into heaven - or making a show of how religious they were - then it's really just a long-term insurance scheme that someone else is going to go on to manage the complexities of for them. I'm not sure that's really any different to paying a pension company that manages part of it's liabilities via long-term bonds.
I think the development has gone on as people have moved to bigger cities, and increased their exposure to other human beings. In the old days, we only interacted with 10-20 people on a daily basis(your butcher, your barber, your few co-workers, etc). Now, living in large cities, we have interact/encounter with hundreds of random strangers everyday.
While I agree that this is a phenomenon, it's too soon to tell how it will play out. It's not possible to be meaningfully productive if you're unable to focus, so this could just be a function of the ages which are represented. Perhaps they'll learn through the requirements of higher education? I've regularly espoused that the biggest advantage to hiring someone with a degree is that they've shown that they can complete a pointless task that they don't enjoy.
> One step, I think, is to take a weekly holiday from your devices.
You have just lost. Denying yourself something is not a viable way to avoid it. (Don't think about elephants.)
There are only two solutions here. Either become someone else, change yourself so that you do not crave it any more, or displace it with something else.
If you want to be fit, or at least less flabby, the psychologically viable route is to tell yourself "I am the kind of person who does 50 pushups after getting out of bed in the morning." Or, "I am the kind of person who cooks his own low-carb meals." And then actually become that person.
If you don't want to stare at your phone in a public place, displace that behaviour with something else. "Instead of mindlessly browsing HN, I'll go talk to that cute chick at the end of the bar." Or even just "I will meditate, I will think about nothing but my breathing while waiting for that coffee." Though that might be even weirder than playing with your smartphone.
As right as you are, routine and habit play a part here. Intentionally leaving the phone behind at times will force you to displace the phone behavior with something else during the times you are waiting. That way, in the future, it's easier to do.
But still, I am not too sure about all this. Obviously if you are with friends or loved ones you should keep the phone in your pocket, but I can't really say for sure that staring out a window while waiting for something is any better than checking Twitter.
Sure, but maybe you only have so much willpower to work with (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ego_depletion). It's really interesting how it really is just as easy as making a decision, or just telling yourself something, but so many of us fail so often to do that kind of thing. This is something that bothers me deeply. This failure to do what we know we ought to demonstrates the tension which comes from this struggle between thinking we're really in control when we might not be. Interesting conflict there. Definitely worth thinking about - or ignoring entirely.
Anyways, that doesn't have any impact on other people doing the phone thing. It's a lot easier to not be nose-deep in your phone when other people are engaging with you. I find that most people settle into the "trance" based on whether other people are on their phones. The people who start the "trance" are often preoccupied or just plain rude.
Another facet to this is that we just don't know where this is going. Is it a step forwards or backwards. Hard to say that it looks like a good thing, but many of us didn't grow up with it - what will the story be like in 50 years? None of us has a clue, to be honest.
Anyways, I think what it comes down to is the "responsible use" cliche. There are so many constructive things you can do with technology. But here we all are, reading these comments which don't matter and are just random people screaming into the void. Shit.
> maybe you only have so much willpower to work with
That's one of the reasons why simply denying yourself won't work. Hence the trick.
It takes no willpower to do pushups for someone who does pushups. That's just who he is. Now, go be that person. Or, pretend you are. I'm sure you've seen some movie where the guy works out every morning? Ocean's Twelve, Fracture, whatever. Pretend to be him.
> It's a lot easier to not be nose-deep in your phone when other people are engaging with you.
You have no control over what other people do. But you have a nearly total control over what you do. Then go engage with someone nose-deep in their phone.
Here's the thing, whatever crazy app they have, it's not that interesting. In fact, the interaction with their phone brings so little value that you don't even need to chat them up, just looking at someone for three seconds will likely grab their attention.
Denying yourself something is an effective way of getting out of an addiction. If the problem with phones is indeed addiction, that's the way to do it.
It works because the more you avoid doing something, it gets easier to not do it again. If you force yourself not to use the phone for a while (even if by extreme means), it becomes easier to just say no at other times. That is, (it's worth repeating) if the problem is really addiction.
It's not simply that we're constantly hunting for information. It's that too much information is crap. We use Facebook to find out what our best friend watched on television this week, read some blog about "10 secrets of successful entrepreneurs" (they really aren't secret), then head over to our favorite news site to have our political opinions affirmed by pundits.
The advertising revenue model gives the media incentives to make lots of cheap, addictive information. They don't have an incentive to make quality information. So we get what we pay for.
I have vowed to spend less time consuming and more time doing. It's hard. I cave in often. But I recommend it.
We use Facebook to find out what our best friend watched on television this week rather than calling up our best friend, going out to dinner with them, and taking about what they watched on TV this week.
Faceboook is very superficial interaction. I liken it to people shouting into a crowded room.
"Maybe they're trying to catch your latest tweet?" was the reply that I wanted to send, but I didn't want to come off as cheeky to someone I revered.
Is the article not a distraction in itself? Sure enough, I came upon it this morning while I was browsing Twitter from my bed. The article itself is over 2000 words long; some of those words being a transcript from a 15 minute video. Now here I am commenting on it; taking up additional time from my day to formulate these points rather than attending to other things; reinforcing the dissonant relevance and irony of the points that the article is making. This article on distraction is a distraction in itself, and my viewership was predicated on finding it on a distracting service used from a distracting device. I found it and read it because I didn't have anything subjectively better to do at the time.
This has been on my mind through internships at several major silicon valley social networking companies. There's a line of thinking in the industry that, when revenue is driven by ad impressions, driving more interactions with your product is the highest goal. This means two things: getting more users (fine) and driving more interactions per user (dangerous).
Posted the guy on the blog with the RSS, twitter, email links prominently at top right.
There is an assumption that those things he laments are functional parts of today's and tomorrow's world. Maybe he's just really boring and people would rather watch a stream of bullshit tweets than discuss the weather with him... because he seems a bit of a malcontent or judgmental.
One person's distraction is another's attention and purpose. It's the outsider watching the 'distracted' trivializing the value of the benefits that the actor is receiving. How smug.
Context is everything. Opinions are nothing. Smartphones only fail at optimizing the bandwidth of purposeful living in so much as those information flows have not been built out.
If people are anxious about the next packet that comes to them, it might be that they feel unsatisfied with the company and activities before them. People aren't being distracted by the devices. They are hunting for higher purpose.
The funniest part is that this "culture of distraction" is so neglictible today compared to what it will be in 50 or 100 years.
"Remember 2013 when we didn't have those lenses showing continuous news feed? When we didn't have 360° vision camera wired directly to our brain? Back then our attention span was sooo high"
I think our human desire for constant attention, feedback, approval, communication, collaboration, instant satisfaction, etc. has always been there. But now technology has caught up.
Perhaps though the pendulum will swing back the other way if technology enables us to get too much instant, constant attention?
I don't think it's 'perhaps', as much as 'eventually'. One defining characteristic of human (USA at least) generations is their absolute burning desire to find fault in the social norms of the previous generation.
It stands to reason that the next generation or the one after will take it a step back from smart phones and everything instantly accessible simply because that's what their parents or grandparents thought was cool.
You're already seeing this - hipsters are entranced by the pastoral - city chickens/livestock, city farms, etc.
Personally I think it's more likely that we'll adapt over the next few generations to cope with it, than it is that a conscious effort on our part will reverse the trend.
People underestimate the rate at which social behaviours change. I'm 27 and have younger cousins who have completely different social conventions and understandings in and out of school than what I experienced. Much of that is due to pervasiveness of the net and mobile. It's really bizarre.
There is also a human desire to consume lots of sweet and/or salty, or fatty food. It has always been there, and for good evolutionary reasons. But then the fast-food technology caught up. And now watch the results.
When "The Net Is a Waste of Time"[1] (an editorial by William Gibson) was discussed[2] on Hacker News:
> The winning quote: "[sic] surfing the Web is a procrastinator's dream. And people
> who see you doing it might even imagine you're working."
> - https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=5262229
Mindfulness meditation[1] is an old but very effective way of training the mind to recognize distractions. I agree with the article that the opportunities for distraction are at an all-time high, but the human brain has not changed much in the last few millenia, and the problem of being distracted is almost certainly as old as the first time a person desired to contemplate something. To someone who wishes to devote a significant portion of their day to contemplation (e.g. a Buddhist monk), any distraction can be a setback, and the so-called "monkey mind"[2] is awfully persistent.
Being able to recognize that you are being pulled away from your object of focus is the essential first step to reduce both the frequency and length of distractions. This is one of the goals of mindfulness meditation. Personally, I have found that the simple act of being able to catch myself in the midst of a distraction has improved my ability to focus.
After spending time practicing mindfulness, I have developed a wonderful skill of being able to "switch off" a racing mind and pull myself back down to the task at hand (or to simply pull myself out of an anxious state of mind and into a pleasant one). Importantly, practicing this during 15 minutes of daily meditation has enabled me to do this during any of the other ~1000 waking minutes of each day. The first time I noticed myself do this "automatically" outside of meditation, I was amazed that I was able to cultivate such a skill.
If you are interested in a good primer on mindfulness and how to actually go about meditation, I recommend Mindfulness in Plain English.[3] I recommend it whenever the subject comes up and I'm sure very few people read it, but it had enough of an effect on me that I would not want others to miss out.
Is it that much different to reading a newspaper/mag/book or watching the shop's TV while waiting for fish and chips?
I'm the first to be pissed when people I'm hanging out with start fiddling with their phone but I'm also the first to fiddle with my phone if I have a spare minute waiting for something and there is nobody to offend.
When going out to dinner or a bar, I like the idea of everyone stacking their phones on the table. Everyone time someone can't resist touching their phone they have to shout a round of drinks.
There's nothing really new in this talk but I have to say it was well-delivered. Well enough that I want to really resolve to keep my phone in my pocket whenever I'm with someone - even if they get up from the table. It's of course unconscionable to start tapping around while you're in the middle of a conversation, but I'm very well-acquainted with the impulse to check facebook or email as soon as a friend goes to the bathroom. I'll really try to capture that valuable mind-wandering time.
Distracted from what? If we're distracted from socialization, its probably that whoever we're socializing isn't that interesting. No longer thinking/pondering? I use those mindless games to 'ponder'- They are simple enough it doesn't take much mental process to play, but leaves enough for me to think about what needs to be thought out (problems, the day, world problems, etc). The same arguments he's made have been made about books for centuries.
I just wanted to say that Joe Kraus did an awesome job at keeping my attention and presenting his ideas. It is extremely odd how much people rely on phones, but I think it's deeper that that and it's actually the internet that is the fundamental issue. Yes, it's a great resource; it's a great source of entertainment, knowledge and potential power. But for something that could be described as intangible it seems to be quite detrimental to us as a society.
I'm sure there's some danger in all this distraction but I also think that people really weren't that interesting and interested before smartphones. Smart and creative people will always find ways to do smart and creative things but lots of people just look for distraction in whatever form they can find.
The point about kids is an important one, though. Smartphone-parents do set a bad example for their kids.
You can't blame a "smartphone" for the distraction. It is merely a tool. People don't like to think or create, they like to consume. The smartphone is the best tool for consumption. I try to chose when I want to interact with my phone. Sometimes that means ignoring texts or calls, and turning off notifications. Not perfect but it is a start.
I experience this. But my addiction is for information, technical articles, scientific papers in mathematics, physics, machine learning, biology. Now I can do it all on my phone anywhere, anytime. Texting and social media are of little interest to me... Do you think this is still something I should worry about?
What is this "are creating"? We've had one for decades. We've refined it tremendously over the last 50+ years, by taking advantage of new technological achievements, but the fundamentals have been in place a lot longer than the article's author seems to think.
This resonates so much with me and my kids. On Saturday when school is out, they'll spend 80+% of their day engaging with one screen or another. And during my non-work time, blogs and forums (ahem), online news and magazines are where I end up spending a lot of time...
Maybe your family should try what the person in the video has, a weekly "non-screen" day where everyone turns off their cellphones, computers, and TVs. Your kids might object at first, but it will be good for them in the long run.
Wouldn't that just open up the family to be 'distracted' by something else? If the family wants social time, yes, there should be a social time set up for games or mutual activity, but otherwise it will just open up for kids to be distracted with books. I've heard very social parents complain that their kids rather read than go play with other kids (and been complaint since books/learning has been around). I knit to keep my hands busy when watching anything or in church listening.
interesting point about the notifications from cellphones being random (and thus addictive like gambling). Perhaps mine would be less random if I were to use the "different sounds for different people" feature...
to play devil's advocate (I don't necessarily believe this; I just don't know) - why is this necessarily a problem? For example, one possibility is: Over time, an increased culture of distraction will through social selection filter itself out into "improved multitasking ability". There are always growing pains associated with any seismic shift in society, especially those created by technology. What makes this one different, or are you someone who laments that time given over to learn cursive is now used to teach children to type?
This is why I walk. I don't drive, or even have a car. I do my best thinking when I walk and my mind is free to roam. VOW of NOW[1], Summon the Warrior[2] and my upcoming Self Experiments[3] are all products of walking and gap time.
Not only does walking spark creativity, but I've met a lot of new people this way.
For me cycling does the trick. At one point there comes a feeling of being in a zone, where puzzle pieces in the brain just start to get put together. For this reason I always have a voice recorder in my cycling gear.
I also find cycling to and from work helps process the day. Cycling forces you into the now, you have to deal with the reality of situations around you. My theory is a that this has some similarities to sleep in that it frees up the brain to perform that clever thing it does that makes you smarter. Probably.
There's something to this for sure. I went from not riding a bike in 10 years to doing a 111 mile ride this summer. One of the main things I noticed was a noticeable drop in negative thoughts/anxiety in my daily life. When you're pushing your body to its limits, combating fatigue and pain, your thought process seems to really change. In the moment it's kind of like meditation, and afterwards it adds some perspective to things.
Considering that I'm almost thirty and still don't have a drivers license, simply because it overloads me with multitasking issues (looking around, steering, the mess that is changing gears, all the other knobs) yet have succesfully been combining walking with all kinds of activities since a very early age, I respectfully disagree.
EDIT: Although the points raised by others about cars providing a nice isolated comfortable environment makes a lot of sense as well. I guess it all depends.
Allow me to disagree (after all, you don't drive). Driving becomes subconscious after a short time, something most drivers can confirm, and the driving environment is actually less stimulating than walking. I would bet "subconscious walking" or "subconscious cycling" is a much less common thing, due to the larger number of distractions/unexpectedness.
Quick test: it's easier to concentrate for lengths of time listening to the radio when in the car than when walking.
Disagree with your Disagreeing. You don't want the act of driving to become subconscious, because that means you miss stuff like stop signs and pedestrians. I hate driving. Way too much to pay attention to (signs, lights, pedestrians, other drivers/cars, trying to remember directions). I know that if I start making it subconscious, I start speeding and missing information.
It's contextual. If you walk or drive in a disrupting location you won't be able to wander or think. Taking the bus works sometimes when they're almost empty. One disappointing thing I learned is that the less efficient is biking, I thought I'd be able to day dream while riding but it's the fastest path to injuries.
For me, cycling sort of clears my mind by grabbing my attention. So it's great if I'm angry, frustrated, or depressed. But the attention grab also works against thought, so I simply cannot daydream or think about stuff while cycling, even if I wanted to. And I would love to. It's a shame really, because I love cycling. I also love being deep in thought, which happens mostly when I'm walking, sometimes in the shower.
EDIT: The attention grab isn't because of traffic. I can ride an empty road in the middle of nowhere and the action of pedalling and looking down the road just grabs me.
Totally, I forgot that. Having to go all in into an activity is pretty awesome. Physical ones are very challenging for the mind, be aware, react, control your body. It's kind of faking pressure on your brain to cleanse it. In a smaller scale, playing drums or music does that too.
Depends on where you live - I grew up in the countryside of the Netherlans, which has excellent biking infrastructure, almost no traffic, and a calm environment in general. Biking to and from school every day was very good for my mind.
Well you are lucky. Somewhere between bad drivers, bad roads and the lack of any flat distance whatsoever, it's impossible for me to leave my mind off the road for any length of time when cycling.
Oh okay then, the main bike lane in my area has regular curves and vicious intersections, with people/kids walking by. I don't stare at girls anymore since I don't like kissing trees that much.
I mostly agree but vehicles shields you from the environment which is nice too. I don't know how many people function this way but being in my own physical bubble makes my brain expand.
Unbelievable, and you get downvoted for this. Folks, you've all had ideas come to you in the shower, yes? The heat, the warmth, the isolation from all else tends to make it a great place to just relax and think.
Now imagine a mobile climate-controlled bubble with no noise but whatever you put on the radio or barring that, the constant background of rubber rolling across asphalt, and you get that same effect.
All in all there are different environment which helps thinking. Long walks put your body in long term effort, releases endorphins which helps inspiration, or at least relaxation. Isolation helps too, be it showers, cars, toilets ... whatever works.
Distraction and technology are related, insofar that technology allows for distraction, but it does not mandate it.
The mistaken assumption is that a person must be "distracted" by one's phone, when that may not be the case at all. Since when was reading a magazine being "distracted", or reading a book being "distracted"? Why is playing a video game considered a distraction?
The facts presented in this article, and the conclusions drawn by this article are orthogonal. Yes, we're bad at multitasking, and yes, people out in the world are buried in their phones more and more, but the connection between multitasking and looking at my phone isn't there.
Besides, why do I have to be particularly good when I'm playing Angry Birds or reading HN? I don't care if I'm performing 10 IQ points or 40% worse than if I were checking my text messages in a park by myself.
The article makes another false assumption that we must always be at our best whenever we do something, which is also untrue. Sure, I could use my slow, deliberate mental system to make all my choices, and I'd be immensely slow but very accurate. Or, I could use my fast, intuitive mental system to make quick, if less accurate decisions that usually get me where I want to be, or in a position I want to be in. I don't need to use my whole brain to hold a conversation with a friend, and I don't need to use my whole brain to wait in line for fish and chips.
There is an anxiety towards seemingly doing nothing, and it's well founded. The author talks about anxiety like it's the enemy, when in reality it's a necessary motivator.
This is one of the major problems pointed out in Noam Chomskys manufacturing of consent (1992). Its a really nice documentary. I think the entire thing is uploaded to youtube
A while ago, could be 3 or so years, I was in my local fish and chip shop. For those who don't know, there are small take away food shops in the UK (and I guess else where) and generally you wander up, order your food, then usually wait a few minutes while your order is put together or cooked. 10 mins or so. (I like the wait because usually it means my food is being cooked fresh.)
Usually I stand to the side waiting, and just gaze around, usually at the world going by out side the window. Normally the customers are not just one off people, but a couples or a pair of friends, or a parent and kids, and so on. You know, a decent variety of however people come. Usually there is a bit of a buzz of conversation and what not.
This time, I looked up, and all 10 or so of the people waiting in the show were literally buried, absorbed in their smart phones, and the shop stood stark silence. The people on their own, the kids, the parents, the couples, the whole damn lot. The only sounds were of the people working in the shop preparing the food.
Usually when the food is cooked, the person behind the counter only needs to mention the beginning of the order and the right person usually snaps in to action to retrieved their food, and leave the shop. This time I noticed it took up to 3 or 4 attempts before the smart phone spell was broken and the person realized their food was ready.
And the weirdest thing was, as they came to, coming out of their smart phone spell, each and every one of them had that look of some one who had just woken up in the morning. Eyes blinking, rubbing eyes, the slow realization of where you are, what you are doing, what comes next, etc.
I found the whole thing incredible creepy.
And since then, I've seen it more and more. In fact, I have even been round people houses or in a pub, where there are a few people meeting up, and I've observed the exact same thing. Oh, add to that, railway stations, bus stops, and so on.
OK, smart phones are very, very useful. Great little devices. But Im not so sure about they way people use them. Seems to me there must be something socially damaging about over use. Its like having the kid who is (exaggerate to show the point time) 24/7 in his/her bedroom on their computer. Now its like that but we can take the computer everywhere. Yeah, we can isolate ourselves anywhere.