I prefer the Manc version of PHP (which syntactically has bugger all in common with PHP coz thats how we roll in Manc):

    alright ar kid?
      im not being funny but x = y
      z is like 10 * 10 int it
      
      you got a spare minute?
         can you just do this for us
            // codage
         while im sorting this out
            // conditionage
      ta son

      if /*function*/ is acting the goat
          bloody_nora (error)
      
      summat wrong? nah : damn fucking right flower