Exactly! Furthermore: In that case, it gets more vexing the longer it takes you to arrive at that conclusion.
When it's the other way round, you can find peace at some point (even if it takes months or years). But if you were the brick wall, it first takes months or years and THEN, when you finally do realize the reality of the situation, it takes even longer to settle. shudders
I know those types of conversations. They stay with you for months and sometimes years, never ceasing to irritate.