A well written post and a lot of good lessons. I really liked your 2 tips for spotting expensive middle men in particular. Seems obvious when you think about it, but well worth being conscious of.
No, he pointed out how a normally positive gesture (saying "i'll find out") can be an indicator of a more subtle problem (intermediaries).
I think its very easy to forget those signs of a more subtle issue and just be glad each question is being answered in a "timely enough" manner when you ask it.
Not a big fan of references to be honest. Everyone must have a few people willing to exaggerate for them. A referral from someone you already know and trust is different, but a reference from someone you arent that familiar with is fairly meaningless I think.
