What's wrong with growing a neckbeard? For the kids around here; it hides your 7 chins when you get older and it looks more natural and is cheaper than plastic surgery! Disclaimer: I do Haskell, Mercury and have a neckbeard :)

Neckbeards are heavily recommended for 22 year old metal musicians and fixed gear riders, actually. Mercury, hmm, that's like being a clean, dylan, mozart/Oz, miranda, or maybe modern Eiffel programmer, or having a unicorn in your backyard

But i'm also a metal musician (guitar) but not 22 (since a long time :)... And Mercury yeah that's my fondness for Prolog (ducking) and Haskell combined. Shame it's not more famous; it's very nice language imho. (I'm not telling you about Einhorn though, that's a secret)