First of all, the pilot is only required for decoding stereo and RDS. Mono FM does not use a pilot, so obviously there had to be a way to detect FM before stereo came along. I linked to a few of the approaches in a sibling (cousin?) comment.
Second, the pilot is embedded in the decoded FM audio. You need to demodulate FM to get to it in the first place. If you look at the waterfall display in an SDR receiver, it might seem like the signal is already present in the original radio frequencies (especially during silent periods), but it's there only indirectly.
If you have silence in an FM transmission (say 96.6 MHz), the only audio component present is the 19 kHz pilot signal, which causes the FM radio signal frequency to vary between 96.6 MHz ± k*19 kHz (not sure what's the value for k, but it's not 1). The sine likes to spend most of the time near the extreme values of its range; plot a histogram of a sine wave and you'll see peaks on either end.
The waterfall is basically a histogram over frequencies so it gets those peaks as streaks on both sides of the main carrier frequency (plus smaller ones for other components in the signal).
The 19 KHz pilot tone is interesting: it's not filtered out and is often reproduced by the speakers if you have good ones. You can verify this by using an audio spectrum analyzer application on your phone.
I've wondered if FM stereo drives pets nuts with its constant high-pitched tone.
First of all, the pilot is only required for decoding stereo and RDS. Mono FM does not use a pilot, so obviously there had to be a way to detect FM before stereo came along. I linked to a few of the approaches in a sibling (cousin?) comment.
Second, the pilot is embedded in the decoded FM audio. You need to demodulate FM to get to it in the first place. If you look at the waterfall display in an SDR receiver, it might seem like the signal is already present in the original radio frequencies (especially during silent periods), but it's there only indirectly.
If you have silence in an FM transmission (say 96.6 MHz), the only audio component present is the 19 kHz pilot signal, which causes the FM radio signal frequency to vary between 96.6 MHz ± k*19 kHz (not sure what's the value for k, but it's not 1). The sine likes to spend most of the time near the extreme values of its range; plot a histogram of a sine wave and you'll see peaks on either end.
The waterfall is basically a histogram over frequencies so it gets those peaks as streaks on both sides of the main carrier frequency (plus smaller ones for other components in the signal).