>Reads like Mark Twain’s short piece “A Plan for the Improvement of English Spelling”
Which is a gem, regardless of authorship. Another related bit associated with Twain is:
“whenever the literary german dives into a sentence, this is the last you are going to see of him till he emerges on the other side of his atlantic with his verb in his mouth.”[0]
Which, as a native English speaker who learned German, I find both amusing and (mostly) correct.
https://faculty.georgetown.edu/jod/texts/twain.html
[edit] Maybe Twain, anyway. The attribution is dubious, but common.