Whether DHH is a jackass is a matter of opinion in itself, of course. But he certainly seems to go out of his way to piss people off. Usually that's a sign of unresolved childhood issues. (Not to go all pop-psych on you guys, but it's kind of obvious to me that he and his father don't get along and that his dad is the controlling type. The book kind of writes itself.)
DHH has one (poorly stated, inflammatory) statement I do agree with at core: if you like Rails and it works for you, great. You don't have to like the guy to use the software.
But maybe the Merb guys, who have a reputation for being logical, accomodating, and nice, will inject some much-needed civility into the Rails core group.
DHH is definitely not being a jerk. The quote the author supplies for DHH's "being a dick in the past" is “I’m not in this world to create Rails for you. I’m in this world to create Rails for me and if you happen to like that version of Rails that I’m creating for me, than you are going to have a great time.”
There's nothing wrong with building your project, for you. David isn't being paid to do Rails by anyone other than 37signals. As we recently touched upon with Capistrano's "800lb gorilla, but it's not _my_ gorilla", there's nothing that makes you a dick for not developing features you don't need.
In fact, I don't ever really think I've actuality seen DHH be much of a dick, to anyone. Linus Torvalds, now he's a dick! Maybe DHH needs to man up and talk some shit about GNOME and C++ more often?
DHH, the 37signals and the Rails community at large has aspirations of actually being a community. DHH played an active role in developing the community.
Once you do that, and engage people in helping with a community project, it's not his anymore. It's a community project.
That is the fundamental difference between "building your project, for you." If DHH had just put up a repo and said, "sure you can pull from this if you want, have fun!" that's different.
Once you start holding classes and publishing books, and advocating for your framework, one's responsibility to one's users changes.
So, IMO, that is a massive dick move. Even if DHH is an extraordinarily nice guy in person. That is a move that says "i honestly don't care about the community i have helped to build, unless they accept everything i do."
Second, i think that
------------------------
Linus is a huge cock. Although on his count, i've never seen him wish anyone ill will, regardless of how many times he tells people that they're stupid and to STFU. He's mean, but he's not malevolent. Not that i think i'd ever like to have a conversation with the man :P
He built Rails for him - and it has taken on a life of its own. And that's awesome.
I think the Merb guys are brilliant - I was really impressed by them at the MerbCamp in SD this past September. I'm excited about Rails 3.