Two things, first, while I think monogamy is probably good for society in that it gives average men/women a chance to meet each other when all the most desirable mates are taken off the market, in actual fact I think it also causes a bunch of these problems. People in their 20's are told "find someone to spend the rest of your life with" so its this super risky high stress situation rather than being a "lets hang out until we are tired of each other". Partially forced by western civilization largely trying to make little atomic families rather than making child rearing a community/extended family effort where a parent can continue to fully participate even if they don't happen to be sleeping with the child's other parent. So, IMHO marriage as this big social function is really dumb, and unneeded for two people to shack up. These days its largely a "we are going to make a family party", except when it isn't. And given humans seem to be a serially monogamous species, it probably should take that into account.
Anyway, part two of this is sorta related, but the attitude of the lady in the wheelchair I find stunningly toxic and lacking any kind of self awareness. I have a feature that everyone always notes and asks about too, but long ago I realized that people rarely if ever were looking to be rude or prying or anything like that. Its largely a conversation point, but particularly around dating, it might seem a bit forward to ask if she is sexually functional, but no more so than questions like "do you want kids". Sure it might be better saved for some future date, but I'm guessing two things. First very very few people are going to be looking to date/etc someone who isn't sexually functional, and its probably a good idea to clear the air on something like that early, but also I suspect few people ask it in such a crass way. Which is suggested by the wording where the woman infers that is what they are asking and blocks them.
So, i'm guessing few people are trying to denigrate her, they just are touching on a subject without their brains fully engaged to the idea she might be sensitive to that topic. Or maybe some of them are just trying to get to know her and understand her situation in life from an empathetic stance. Which means the problem is really her sensitives. People are expressing interest in her despite her problems, and to block them because they dared ask a question is what is toxic. Unless your goal is to be single until you find someone who isn't a bit clumsy everyone needs to give potential partners a bit of slack. Even without the wheelchair its impossible to find that perfect person, people screw up, etc. Excluding people with negative traits they are unwilling/incapable of fixing is one thing, but that isn't displayed by a question that many people would consider one of the more important parts of dating.
Anyway, part two of this is sorta related, but the attitude of the lady in the wheelchair I find stunningly toxic and lacking any kind of self awareness. I have a feature that everyone always notes and asks about too, but long ago I realized that people rarely if ever were looking to be rude or prying or anything like that. Its largely a conversation point, but particularly around dating, it might seem a bit forward to ask if she is sexually functional, but no more so than questions like "do you want kids". Sure it might be better saved for some future date, but I'm guessing two things. First very very few people are going to be looking to date/etc someone who isn't sexually functional, and its probably a good idea to clear the air on something like that early, but also I suspect few people ask it in such a crass way. Which is suggested by the wording where the woman infers that is what they are asking and blocks them.
So, i'm guessing few people are trying to denigrate her, they just are touching on a subject without their brains fully engaged to the idea she might be sensitive to that topic. Or maybe some of them are just trying to get to know her and understand her situation in life from an empathetic stance. Which means the problem is really her sensitives. People are expressing interest in her despite her problems, and to block them because they dared ask a question is what is toxic. Unless your goal is to be single until you find someone who isn't a bit clumsy everyone needs to give potential partners a bit of slack. Even without the wheelchair its impossible to find that perfect person, people screw up, etc. Excluding people with negative traits they are unwilling/incapable of fixing is one thing, but that isn't displayed by a question that many people would consider one of the more important parts of dating.