Your example conveys that gaslighting occurs as between three (or more) parties, but that's not necessarily the case. Gaslighting most often happens between two individuals.

OP's boss wrongly and intentionally asserting OP didn't do something on time would be gaslighting. So too is each of the following. They are more commonly referred to as gaslighting. That's because they're more subtle, yet might have an even more profound impact:

* You are remembering things wrong.

* You always make a big deal out of these things.

* You need to learn how to take criticism better.

Of course it really depends on the situation. Suppose I negligently publish my organisation's private API keys to a public Git repository. My boss calls me in and says I shouldn't do that in future. I threaten to quit at being blamed for my mistake. My boss says there's no need for it to come to that, and I should be open to constructive feedback. None of this is gaslighting, it's all grounded in facts and reality.

Wikipedia is, of course, not an authority on the use of language. However, it looks like your example is the alternative definition they give, rather than the main one they talk about: making someone question their reality. You can do this by making someone think that by offering erroneous and gratuitous remarks to them.

Nobody’s making OP question their reality according to OP’s story. It just seems that OP was completely unaware of the manager’s opinion and now he became aware of it.

There’s nothing nefarious in that, happens all the time.