I never had a head injury per se, but I did hit my head a couple of times with no particular changes in perception, but as someone with OCD and probably a whole range of other undiagnosed disorders, and probably future schizophrenic as I don't know how to get out of the pit I've dug myself.
I wanted to talk about a special case of brain injury, namely: self-asphyxiation through psychogenic problems.
I had to experience this myself the last month, I wasn't particularly aware that such a thing could occur, 2 weeks ago I was in a delusional loop, that in turn caused me anxiety, which lead to psychogenic dyspnea(irregular breathing, feels like choking). It wouldn't dissipate for a long time, my head or brain I'm not sure what to call it anymore, constantly: tingling, itching, like gears constantly pulsating, until the sudden onset of what felt like a screw loosening and jumping out, this is the best analogy I can think of as of now. This isn't a one time occurrence, there have been plenty of similar experiences that I've piled up over a timespan of 3 years as of now. I am 24, just for the record.
As the reader may infer, sleep schedule?: sucks, diet?: sucks. friends?: none. Loneliness?: since a long time.
I'd like to think of myself as someone very patient and resistant to most things other humans can't deal with, but I too have occasional meltdowns. In some rather amusing fashion, I've glanced upon this post before sleep, and after sleeping I broke down in tears, and came back to this thread. Everything is becoming too much, I probably have to seek help, this facade of the invincible is probably hindering me much more, and the delusion of self-progress through ones own intellectual effort seems to be in vain, more and more. I'm trapped in this maze within a maze, I've given up as of present. I don't know how to continue, but I will.
There is no tyrant, like a brain.
edit: I'm at a point where I can't tell apart whether I became dumber due to the asphyxiation or not, I do notice a change in perception ever since that last week, but is that a delusion? Can I delude myself of a feeling, a physical one at that? And, yes, I don't visit the doc very often. Nonetheless, as the days pass my capabilities seem to return more and more to the "usual".
I wanted to talk about a special case of brain injury, namely: self-asphyxiation through psychogenic problems.
I had to experience this myself the last month, I wasn't particularly aware that such a thing could occur, 2 weeks ago I was in a delusional loop, that in turn caused me anxiety, which lead to psychogenic dyspnea(irregular breathing, feels like choking). It wouldn't dissipate for a long time, my head or brain I'm not sure what to call it anymore, constantly: tingling, itching, like gears constantly pulsating, until the sudden onset of what felt like a screw loosening and jumping out, this is the best analogy I can think of as of now. This isn't a one time occurrence, there have been plenty of similar experiences that I've piled up over a timespan of 3 years as of now. I am 24, just for the record.
As the reader may infer, sleep schedule?: sucks, diet?: sucks. friends?: none. Loneliness?: since a long time.
I'd like to think of myself as someone very patient and resistant to most things other humans can't deal with, but I too have occasional meltdowns. In some rather amusing fashion, I've glanced upon this post before sleep, and after sleeping I broke down in tears, and came back to this thread. Everything is becoming too much, I probably have to seek help, this facade of the invincible is probably hindering me much more, and the delusion of self-progress through ones own intellectual effort seems to be in vain, more and more. I'm trapped in this maze within a maze, I've given up as of present. I don't know how to continue, but I will.
There is no tyrant, like a brain.
edit: I'm at a point where I can't tell apart whether I became dumber due to the asphyxiation or not, I do notice a change in perception ever since that last week, but is that a delusion? Can I delude myself of a feeling, a physical one at that? And, yes, I don't visit the doc very often. Nonetheless, as the days pass my capabilities seem to return more and more to the "usual".