These are really good :-)

The last one is an excellent jab at devotees of dynamically typed languages.

Neat submission. Copied and saved!

Uh, it was a jab at Haskell & lazy evaluation:

> He plunged into deep meditation in the middle of conversations

...forcing a large complicated thunk in the middle of a simple function definition

> could not help waking up late in the morning

...all expressions are suspended by default

> and failed to do his chores in a timely manner.

...evaluation is delayed.

> "You must go back to your strict ways."

...the opposite of "strict" being "lazy", in FP terms.

The comments confirm it, the "H___ temple" being the Haskell community.