>The tone is not more important than the facts. It never is
I think this framing is wrong. Tone and facts are both important (often equally so) and must both be addressed in parallel tracks.
If someone rudely raises concerns about the security of your product, it's fine to ban them as long as you also address their claims of insecurity. You can kill a community by not addressing claims of technical flaws and you can kill a community by not enforcing standards of conduct within it.
I think this framing is wrong. Tone and facts are both important (often equally so) and must both be addressed in parallel tracks.
If someone rudely raises concerns about the security of your product, it's fine to ban them as long as you also address their claims of insecurity. You can kill a community by not addressing claims of technical flaws and you can kill a community by not enforcing standards of conduct within it.