I'd like to commit to a really modest lifestyle, maybe until 2025, and see where I end up.
No high ambitions. No lust for good food or sugary water. No compulsion to impress anyone, including clients and bosses. No raging at things I don't take action on.
I'd like to go to bed, calm, not worried about the books I need to be reading or the projects I should be finishing. I'd like to actually be bored, and accept the boredom as a fine thing.
Throwaway cause this is personally embarrassing - have some semblance of a relationship with the opposite sex. I'm in my late twenties and have never been in any sort of romantic relationship. Never had sex or even kissed. I don't know what it is but I keep preventing myself from going through with any of these. I have just about everything else going half decently: I have a well paying job, some friends, hobbies, my own apartment, etc. but something in my psyche doesn't let me venture down that path. I have had a few dates here and there which obviously led to nothing, which leads me to wonder what is wrong with me. Actually committing myself to dating and romantic relationships would be a huge step in my life.
there is, he admits it and wants to fix. He is not going to be happier if we tell him that he should just be happy with what he have. He wants to have a healthy/happy romantic relationship with someone and he deserves it, and it is not a problem to have to work to fix it.
I had the same problem in the past and as a hacker I made a plan to fix it. I can tell you that it worked really well and I barely recognize myself from 5 years ago. But this change wasn't easy and was related to lots of areas in my life: friends, family, fitness, nutrition, work, interests in life. More than wanting to date someone, I invested in becoming someone people want to date.
I really love this: "I invested in becoming someone people want to date." Very wise words.
Although this sentence (about the kind of people people want to date) from La Bruyere's Characters flashed cynically into my mind a moment later. :-)
A man who is vain, indiscreet, a great talker and a mischievous wag, who speaks arrogantly of himself and contemptuously of others, who is boisterous, haughty, forward, without morality, honesty, or commonsense, and who draws for facts on his imagination, wants nothing else, to be adored by many women, but handsome features and a good shape.
Also it reminded me of George Clooney writing somewhere that he started getting acting work after he totally changed his mindset in auditions–from asking, pleading give me something I want, to seeing himself as offering his talents, contributing something unique to the production–he had something they wanted, or should.
I'd like to improve my ability to focus and to gear my life towards optimal performance. This should take care of multiple challenges that I facing today.
Most importantly I want to put on weight. At least 30-40lbs. Unfortunately I'm still trying to work out how to optimize my diet because I can only eat so mo much until I become bloated and moderately nauseous
No high ambitions. No lust for good food or sugary water. No compulsion to impress anyone, including clients and bosses. No raging at things I don't take action on.
I'd like to go to bed, calm, not worried about the books I need to be reading or the projects I should be finishing. I'd like to actually be bored, and accept the boredom as a fine thing.