Normally I downvote the hell out of "I read it as 'aliens want to penetrate my anus", har har har!", but in this case I would side with the "kiss this guy" crowd because that is precisely what the title says, even though that's not what the article is about.

I, too, wondered and then thought, "meh, makes sense. I went on a whale watching tour once and don't have much desire to do it again. Ergo, someone is keeping those boats in the water, must be the 'whales' of whale watching tours." Hell, I'd go as far as to massage the data just so the pun would work.