I actually agree with you, a lot of games are being designed to keep you hooked. Which is not the fault of the developers as they have no choice but to try and extract money from their users if they are to survive. Those addict like qualities you saw in your kids, I saw in myself a couple of years ago and made my self go cold turkey. My drugs of choice were team fortress 2 and left 4 dead. I have thousand of hours logged between the two. I've made a lot of positive steps in my life since then and can't help but wonder how far I would have come if I had stopped playing a long time ago.
Congratulations, at least you were able to extract yourself from that road-to-nowhere and have positive things to look forward to. I am sure you'll be very aware of this in the future and help your own kids not get hooked.
As far as this not being the fault of developers. OK, sure, at a basic level, you are absolutely correct. Just like it is far easier for thugs to sell drugs to kids than to go find a real job or start a real company with real products.
The issue here is that all of these game studios go for easy-and-addictive without a care in the world about what damage they are causing. Trying to find new creative and positive gaming experiences is much, much harder. The formula for addictive games is known and relatively easy to implement these days.