That's likely true with anything else in your life. I love to cook, I'm much better than people who doesn't cook but I'm worse than anyone who dedicates 4-8 hours a day every day.

But I don't care, I enjoy it so I keep doing it. Do you not enjoy chess enough to play it without needing another reason?

I rarely cook to win :).

You play chess to win and losing is stressful and unpleasant. So you train more to increase your chances of winning. I still enjoy playing just for fun, but after a couple of "fun" games, the competitive side kicks in and it stops being fun and becomes a goal.

I used to play quite a lot too. I think the thing that stopped me was the realisation that to get really good, you have to memorise openings and responses to openings. If you don't, you'll be working from a disadvantage from the start (if you play someone who knows the opening responses).

My favourite bit was always the middle-game - fun through pure invention and strategy that can't be laid out in a book for memorisation because of the almost infinite possibilities!

I really the book "My 60 Memorable Games" by Bobby Fischer- it really gave you an insight into a great players' thinking:

Yes, I have an obsession with doing stuff that is practical and has real tangible benefits. I can't justify sinking hours into something that won't really advance me in anything other than getting better at chess. If I ever struck my millions and had loads of free time on my hands, maybe it would change for me..

I used to feel the same way, although I didn't get anywhere decent - quit playing after a few months. I thought I won't become anywhere near good so what's the point.

But that was young me, when I would try to be really really good or just quit it, whatever it was :)

Nowadays, I wouldn't care that much. Am I having fun? If yes, I should continue. If no, I should stop doing it if possible. So I'd say as long as you enjoy the time spent playing, that's cool if you worry about some number of the online service (as long as it doesn't get too far). If 5 years later looking back you could say 'oh yeah, that was fun', that's great. Just have fun.

Very few people devote 4-8 hours a day to chess. In fact, if you're willing to devote just three hours per week to target training, you'll quickly improve relative to others.

The important thing is to divorce your enjoyment of the game from the purely competitive aspect of it. This is admittedly hard to do--part of the reason I quit competitive chess was because I got burned out. But I plan on returning soon, because the time off has helped me rediscover my love for the game and I don't think competition will ever remove that from me again.

I face a very similar issue, not with chess but with an online game called CS:GO.

The day you figure out a solution or gain more insight into this, could you please please message me?

Channel it into something competitive that gets you exercise as well. I started BJJ and wrestling in my 40's with no prior experience. The health benefits make it worth it. The depth of the skills keeps me engaged.

I didn't become obsessed, but I agree that it takes sustained effort to get to and maintain an average skill level (1500-1700 ELO).

There's always interesting books to read, developments to follow. It's a time-expensive hobby to have, I stopped playing years ago.

Interesting. My experience was similar when, after years of playing competitively at club level, I decided to give up because I felt I couldn't progress further without devoting several hours a day.

For me it was more because I found chess to be such a demanding game. One can play well for hours (in a serious match) making many good moves only to have it all thrown away by one slip of concentration.

Same thing happens to me.

Then a few years ago, I started doing Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, which sort of tapped into the same challenge/logic pathways.

But BJJ is a physical activity, so that helps justify the obsession.

I stopped playing Diplomacy online as it was by far the biggest component of my mental state while I was playing. Growing up is about becoming self-aware.