Sorry for your loss. Hope it will get better soon.
When I lost someone, people at work felt awkward about asking about it, except for one weird guy that did a lot of charity work. Remember being super pissed at him 3 weeks after the funeral, when he said that the first year if the worst. But he was right.
I really regret not going to a psychologist. I didn't know how to explain it to the family doctor to make him send me to one (live in Norway, where taxes are insane, but if you make your case right, you get almost free medical assistance, capped at $300/y). I also didn't know it was worth it even with costs that seemed prohibitive.
It's worth knowing, that psychologists are like programmers - not everyone is good at everything.
Find a couple specializing in supporting grieving people, see at least 3 and decide which one fits you best.
Once per day, when peeing, do it differently.
1. Release the stream during the in-breath. 2. Stop and hold the stream on the outbreath. 3. If not yet bored or tired go back to 1. Else - finish peeing normally.
That's it.
And note that for most people, a week to few weeks of the exercise give stronger orgasms and ability to delay the ejaculation.
Thank you! Didn't know I endangered people by suggesting it to them.
I usually got bored halfway and after 3-6 breaths finished peeing normally. It was also because I've noticed that the exercise made it very hard to push out the last of urine from the bladder. Now I know it's also very unhealthy not to empty all the way.
As with any internet post about exercise, someone must eventually come along and mention the good old weighted squat. Squats are well known to strengthen pelvic floor.
My own anecdata confirms the benefits of pelvic floor exercises without any kegels, at least back when I regularly did lift weights.
But is stopping the flow of urine an apt description of the exercise? Is it a case of “do it as if you were doing that, without actually doing it while urinating?” If so, I think I’d be hard pressed to find a simpler way to describe it to any man (no idea if it applies to women as well).
Huh. So that “happiness through clenching your butthole daily” or whatever-it-was copy-paste troll that was so common on Slashdot back in the day, was… very close to being excellent advice?
I think people give the cue of stopping urination to help others find the muscles that you need to engage. Otherwise, yes, you absolutely can just do them any time you want. In yoga it’s called mula bandha [1]. You’re often instructed to engage it while practicing asana or pranayama. I even focus on engaging it when I’m out for a run or lifting weights.
Thanks, I think I'll practice whole brushing my teeth, probably the easiest to not forget to do, as it's an everyday thing that I'm unlikely to ever stop doing.
> And note that for most people, a week to few weeks of the exercise give stronger orgasms and ability to delay the ejaculation.
I've experienced all those benefits when I started walking two times a day, 8-10 thousands of steps a day continuously for several weeks. I haven't performed any other exercises.
But it's really boring and you need to do it every day. I do it only because I need to walk a dog.
Photography has made me realize how much I was previously ignoring. There’s so much to see, and even when walking the same route over and over, there’s an astounding amount of change over time. Often little things.
The Bird ID app made me realize just how many unique birds were making up the sounds I was hearing. As I learned to distinguish between them, I found myself fascinated in a way that I’d never been before.
Walks became almost meditative over time, and the sights and sounds a kind of salve for my often tired brain.
I often feel like I can think more clearly when walking as well, and thought processes kind of just sort themselves out as I go.
I highly recommend making walks more than just a way to move your body. They can be much more, and getting the benefits of movement almost feels like a happy side effect.
I also recommend the Seek app by iNaturalist. Though if you’re like me and use it to identify plants and every bug you see, you may not actually get that much walking accomplished.
Season likely plays a factor too. There are many plants that more or less look identical (to the untrained eye) until they either bloom or grow large enough.
true. it is also pretty bad at IDing things that are half-formed, eg a bud that hasn't bloomed yet, presumably because most photos in the dataset are of the blooming version.
Walking is considered by einstein and pretty much all thinkers to be critical to deep work. It's also covered in Cal Newport's book "deep work" briefly. Which is a short audiobook worth reading.
One such prescription would be to do deep work early in the day then walk after and walk again 2 hours before bed. Another would be split the deep work with a 1 hour walk and do the 2nd walk after the 2nd block.
It may be more fulfilling with lots of interesting ideas rattling around. YMMV
I desperately want to do this type of walking, but I live in a major city. There’s always something to distract me, which is great for boredom perhaps, but ruins any sense of zen or reflection. I would say half of every walk involves people yelling, loud vehicles, and louder music. Noise-cancelling headphones are only useful for distraction through podcasts and music, not for decompressing. I’m starting to wonder if the solution, the sad solution, is to walk on a treadmill at a gym during off-peak hours.
Have you considered earplugs? The firearms community have some pretty great ones which are readable and fit really well. Check out Axil x30i for example.
I find thunderstorm noises superior to white/coloured noise - because it's a natural sound the brain filters it out, and obtrustive noises are camouflaged within it, and filtered out too. So the loudness required is less than the loudness needed for white/coloured noise to be effective.
I don't find walking to be boring at all! Especially when I'm working on something new, I will walk as many as 10 miles a day while thinking through all of the design corners.
Even when I'm not working, I like taking long walks to think about family, friends, video games, etc.
Its a great way to get into your head without the distraction of a phone or feed or forced message.
>But it's really boring and you need to do it every day. I do it only because I need to walk a dog.
I'm lucky enough to have a pedestrian path to do my long walks (so no cars or even bikes to contend with, bikes have a dedicated parallel path), so I listen to a podcast while walking around 1 hour/day.
I often listen to podcasts while walking. Or I think. I also own a walking pad and walk while working (1h in the morning, 1h in the afternoon - not every day but most).
You must have been in really bad shape before if you're getting such noticeable health benefits from a rather modest exercise intervention like 8k steps.
Wow, I was so sure it was PC or PV muscle exercise, because author of the book where I learned about the peeing exercise said that men don't have Kegels muscles. I stand corrected.
I'd second it. F1 racing is an interesting combination of sport, physics, aerospace engineering and manufacturing. But most of us don't have the background to fully enjoy what you've said without at least some background.
I'm still recommending Apple to family members (less support needed from me, and I can always say I have Android and can't use apple so I can't help). But you have to go all in. If you want non apple stuff, just use something else. And if you can use Linux etc., why are you using Apple? Other then being lazy, which is totally ok.
I am saying folks who use Linux do not know how to utilize their time well. It’s tongue in cheek at the commentary to the GP but hope that makes more sense to you.
People say this about Linux but it’s not been my experience. Granted I’m 10 years deep now, but everything just works always and is exactly how I like it. Even basic things like menus changing doesn’t happen on Debian. I’m good to go.
Windows? Provided it doesn’t shit the bed, which it often does, things change randomly for no reason and beyond your control. One day you boot up and boom - the UI for x, y, z is different. And there goes 10 hours spread over the next month while you relearn.
It happens that lots of people who use Linux like to mess around with things, and, from a certain perspective, that's a waste of time. (But can be enjoyable.)
But it's perfectly possible to just use Linux and not muck around. Or, at least, to spend less time unwillingly mucking around than one would elsewhere.
(E.g., EndeavourOS, which is, perhaps unexpectedly/ironically, more or less just Arch with a nice installer and a welcome screen, is one of the easiest OSes to deal with. [Maybe not completely unexpectedly, SteamOS is also a customised Arch.] It's not the exciting distro, or the one I'm most likely to talk a lot about; but see the first point.)
Stop taking things so seriously and understand my comment was playful as I already indicated. It was more of a jab at usage of lazy but not in critical way.
Don’t be so critical over a tongue in cheek comment and don’t be so defensive over your choice of inferior products.
It's not OK. This collective laziness and convenience is our number one enemy. People don't want to be responsible, they want some corporation to manage everything so they don't have to think about stuff.
We need more people to take responsibility and use Linux and free software and hardware. Owning the computing system means being responsible for it, and we need to get people to accept that responsibility. The less of us there are, the more business and financial sense it makes for them to just straight up ignore us as some irrelevant vocal minority.
We should all own our computers, and there should be so many of us that they have to suck it up because not doing so means they take a big hit to their profits.
What are you seeing in the world that would led you to think the average Joe can use Linux without someone like us supporting them? Maybe not day to day but they are absolutely going to run into pain points like “Netflix is low quality” or “I need to install this windows app for this new gizmo I bought”.
It’s a fantasy world that Linux desktop is good enough for most people, it just is. I love Linux and use it on all my servers but come on.
It doesn't matter if it's "good enough". These are our systems, they're the only things that are truly ours. The alternative is to become serfs in a trillion dollar corporation's digital fiefdom.
My sincere wish is for "average Joes" to stop being so average. I want them to start taking responsibility for their systems so that we can all enjoy the freedom that brings. Freedom to own the computers and do whatever we want with them, not just what the corporations allow us to do.
If they keep choosing the convenient fiefdom, it's going to destroy everything the word "hacker" ever stood for.
What people aren't generally used to doing is installing OSes. Any OS. Using OSes... Windows 11 is far more complicated, finicky than plenty of Linux installs. (People get caught up in the "you're not holding it right" for Windows/Mac issues.)
> Maybe not day to day but they are absolutely going to run into pain points like “Netflix is low quality” or “I need to install this windows app for this new gizmo I bought”.
The average Joe also faces pain points on Windows.
It’s not a fantasy, we were there at some point and we deliberately moved from it.
When Unix was the norm, everyday employees knew how to navigate a shell. In highschool I had a friend working at the bank. You know what she did all day? Ran SQL queries to make reports. No degree. She wasn’t a programmer. She was a financial analyst.
Now we have people constructing database systems in an excel workbook on a share drive somewhere, but even that’s fading. Now we have people creating systems in Discord and spending 20 hours a week moving data from point A to point B. Tasks that someone 20 years ago could trivially automate. They don’t know how anymore.
We have lawyers paying 20 paralegals to maintain and consolidate a document shared between 10 parties with 50 revisions floating around. We’ve had version control for decades. They refuse to learn. They would rather spend the enormous amounts of man hours doing what is essentially manual labor.
It’s clear that computers are a huge part of our lives. You can learn to use them or you can burn hours - but you can’t opt out.
I mean, Jesus Christ kids these days don’t know what a directory is. We had a short window of computer literate everyday people and then poof! Gone! But the need for computers is still here. And we can’t quite talk to them and tell them what to do yet.
In many places in the world people don't live on ranches or in 1000 m² houses, but in 80-150 m² twin houses or even flats.
In such tighter conditions, you can easily have enough inhabitants per km² that it would justify building small mobile nuclear reactors.
Who would like to live next to a reactor if it can melt down? Well, you have reactors using fuel pellets locked in marbles that due to their diameter can never meltdown.
>Aren't the suits tested for compliance on the athlete?
That's half of the drama: suits have RFID chips identifying them. After the suits have been tested (as this sort of shenanigans is pretty common in this sport), they resew the chips from verified suits onto the tricksuits. This was caught on the video.
ha!
so there is a whole other problem with, fake chips, and other fake stuff, and one of the ways to make a tamper proof, impossible to fake security tag, is to paint it with a "special" paint, full of spakles and micro blobs, resulting in a perfectly random one of a kind spray on label that is impossible to remove, can be done at any scale,and that is scanned, and given a serial #.
so do the chip, do the suit, shoes, whatever needs
to be secured, and released.Any company complisit in assisting cheating, would be given a permanent
ban, along with all principals and those directly involved. And since people are going to jail, for cheating in video games, then perhaps life sentences are apropriate as well.
Don't forget the F-35 is the best plane for the PREVIOUS war. The current and the NEXT war will be fought with drones. And Ukraine is one of the countries that has the best drone industry.
Maybe we (as a Pole living in Norway) can't have state of the art jets, but in practice don't need them?
We (as the whole eastern block - Scands, Balts, Poland, Romania and Ukraine) should cancel our orders of F-35 and focus on developing our drone and strategic missile industry. And focus on investing, developing and buying from our closest allies - the eastern block.
Not on the countries that don't care because they are either too far from Russia (Spain, Italy) or have vested geopolitical interest in alllying with them (Germany). France and UK might want to join to balance out Germany.
At least that's what I understand from hearing smarter than me discuss the current situation.
Which next war? The type of small, short range drones currently being used in Ukraine and Russia won't be of much use in a major regional conflict with China. Ranges will be orders of magnitude longer and communication links for drone control won't be reliable.
The main reason that Ukraine and Russia have had to rely so heavily on drones is that they had no better alternative. The air forces on both sides are shit with zero (or effectively zero) 5th generation aircraft that can survive in a contested environment. The F-35 was designed for that mission and would at least have a chance.
> The air forces on both sides are shit with zero (or effectively zero)
I wouldn't call Russian AF "shit". The УМПК (JDAM) bombs crushed formidable defense of Avdeevka and now hit AFU hard in Sudja. Ka-52 helicopters stopped counteroffensive a year ago. Surely, sky is contested, but it's still important component that hurts Ukraine very hard.
> have had to rely so heavily on drones is that they had no better alternative
What would be an alternative to wing reconnaissance drones? What can hyper-equipped US armed forces offer as a replacement FPV and fiber-optics FPV attack drones? Yeah they have Reapers and other fancy expensive gear for the first 3-4 weeks of active war, then what?
The Russian air force is shit. They have zero capability to conduct close air support and have been reduced to launching stand-off weapons from within their own air defense coverage. This has some value but it's basically just another form of artillery. US tactical air capabilities are on an entirely different level.
The US has a variety of overlapping reconnaissance capabilities including not just large UAVs but also manned aircraft (including the F-35) and multiple satellite constellations. Over the next few years the priorities in that area should be to accelerate the B-21 Raider program (it will make an excellent recon platform) and develop some sort of prompt satellite launch capability to replace combat losses within hours. There is also a general recognition that we'll have to increase spending or shift budget priorities to build up the industrial capacity necessary to sustain longer conflicts.
Have you seen that Chinese dragon made with drones they showed off during the NYE show? Now imagine them autonomous and every carrying a bomb. Even Phalanx will not help you. Bye bye aircraft carriers.
I've seen it. So what. How will those drones get to the aircraft carrier? Their batteries only last a few minutes, and they barely move much faster than a carrier.
Today. So many things we have seen in the last couple of years have been pure sci-fi a decade ago. Switchblade 600, for example, has a loitering time of 40 minutes and a range of 24 minutes.
> and they barely move much faster than a carrier.
Fly in the direction bow to stern, low above the water. Or just ... loiter in the path of the carrier.
You're really missing the point. Have you ever even been on a boat? The Pacific Ocean is a big place, and carriers don't move in predictable straight lines. Drones aren't going to be able to loiter in place indefinitely just on the hope that a carrier might wander into range.
The Chinese are not stupid. Their A2/AD doctrine is based on large, expensive manned aircraft and fast missiles, not slow and weak little "drones".
Personally I oppose sending troops to the front in Ukraine, but for a different reason than others who oppose it: I believe that to send them to already fortified Russian positions is wasteful.
Consequently I believe that if the EU is to intervene, which I think is a very reasonable thing to do, it should be by imitiating the Russian approach of using aircraft as flying artillery-- i.e. to release missiles etc., against Russian positions in Ukraine, but I also believe that we should attack Russian natural gas pipelines, ammonia plants, nitric acid plants, ammunition plants with long-range weapons. I also believe that it's reasonable to send in ground troops to seize Russian and Belarusian territory in locations where it can be determined that Russia lacks artillery, tanks etc., and to in that way force troop movements, thus depleting the front in Ukraine and allowing Ukraine to basically roll it over.
I believe that this is possible for several reasons, among them that we Europeans are three times as many as the Russians. I believe that it is unlikely to lead to nuclear war because I believe that the Russians are rational and well aware that any nuclear use by them leads to a proportional nuclear use by 'us', whatever that means, and that the number of nuclear weapons in Russian control is irrelevant for the reason that they're gone after an exchange of a mere hundred or so, so that anything beyond that is superfluous.
I see no definite borders for EU expansion other than cultural.
There are some problems with Ukraine, there might be if there's too much corruption and oligarchy type stuff, so I don't want to absorb them immediately-- they need huge reforms, but I don't find them objectionable per se. I think they need to get smarter, get rid of their mafia etc., but it might be possible.
It's critical for the EU to prevent this kind of expansionist warfare on its borders.
Small DIY drones are only useful when no side has air superiority. Once you own the air, you can bomb and support ground troops a lot more efficiently.
When I lost someone, people at work felt awkward about asking about it, except for one weird guy that did a lot of charity work. Remember being super pissed at him 3 weeks after the funeral, when he said that the first year if the worst. But he was right.
I really regret not going to a psychologist. I didn't know how to explain it to the family doctor to make him send me to one (live in Norway, where taxes are insane, but if you make your case right, you get almost free medical assistance, capped at $300/y). I also didn't know it was worth it even with costs that seemed prohibitive.
It's worth knowing, that psychologists are like programmers - not everyone is good at everything.
Find a couple specializing in supporting grieving people, see at least 3 and decide which one fits you best.
Sending love, hope you get better!
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