You built this? I have actually used this, which means you are doing something right, because normally I don't register, I go off and build my own version. So kudos!
Last year I only had 2 projects on Elance. One has been running for 14 months now, the other for 7 months. The projects I do for local businesses are also LOB applications that run for 9 months using a full agile workflow, complete with scrum/
I wonder why everybody assumes I'm only doing small projects.
Thats interesting! I only know Elance and Odesk from having a short look, and got the impression that is not worth the time to compete in a race to the bottom for small projects. Good to know, that there are also good projects.
I guess naming Elance as an income caused this "small project" trigger. I also assumed that you are not coding for 20 years, as I read now by your above postings.
No, that is not the case. I've been a developer for nearly 20 years. I have a number of LOB applications under my belt that took years to develop. I have seen it all, but the last two years it's been a struggle.
I agree that it may have to do something with the isolation of freelancing on remote projects via the web, the rapid changes in development as a whole, and information overload.
I definitely agree that there are alot of things out there these days. It's difficult to keep up with those trends. But in my experience solid fundamentals translate well to any "shiny new object". The interfaces are different, and sometimes there's something really innovative about new approaches.
IMO in order to maintain a sanity about it all, you really need to dig into "what is this shiny object really accomplishing". This can help change one's perspective from "I need to learn it all to stay on top of new trends", to the realization that "There are really only a handful of truly innovative things happening behind all the shiny objects".
You are right. I am totally isolated. This consumes me to a point where I sit here for 16 hours a day, learning, coding, dicking around (like another commenter said).
I know I need to break the isolation, but I fear I'm too deep into my own world. I'm The Lawnmower Man (just less evil)
"I know I need to break the isolation, but I fear I'm too deep into my own world."
You're not. You're just afraid you might be.
I feel like I'm breaking through a similar feeling in my work place, so I can relate to the feeling. But talking to coworkers is helping me to see the similarities between how we think and lessen the feeling of isolation.
So just try talking to some people who might share your interests, and see how it goes.
Go find a local meetup, or do volunteer (tech) work for a charity, or tutor/teach, or find a pen pal / forum buddy working in a similar space. -- do something to put some social contact in your work.
"I know I need to break the isolation, but I fear I'm too deep into my own world."
That's the procrastinator in you talking. Or the fear that those things you create won't go big and solve your dream. Forget the YC path and build a side-project/lifestyle venture that is interesting or challenging, and get a good routine going. Maybe it takes off, or maybe it's a steady side-project for a few years - no shame in either.
Build anything that gets you early users as eventually they will take over and be demanding features that give you the impetus you need.
Maybe you've overdone it a bit and lost track of what originally got you into all of this. If you scatter yourself and chase every shiny thing your core motivation gets kind of burnt out but you don't notice it for a while because all those more superficial obsessive drives keep going once the main engine has run out of gas. Perhaps take it easier for a while until you feel a deep urge to do a particular project.
I got like this after many years of study. So much to learn, I turned everywhere at once and learned many things. After several years I ended up feeling lost - this forest was infinitely deep and infinitely broad, and I didn't know where in it I wanted to go. Though I still had personal identifications that said "this is what you do, you're good at this" and the superficial curiosity to keep learning new things, the deep sense of direction was gone.
The only thing I've found that lets it regrow is to give yourself a break, do something different with your life for a bit. When a deep motivation grows, the shiny things won't distract you from it. When they do distract you that's a sign that your deeper drive has withered somewhat. You can't force it to regrow; you have to wait for it to do that on its own.
Consider this: you mentioned a history of depression. Depression doesn't have to be at the level of a major depression to affect your functioning. And moderate chronic depression will certainly affect your focus. I hope I'm wrong, but you should really go and talk to a good psychiatrist/psychologist and see what kind of help you can get and whatever else you might be dealing with. And don't imagine that it means that you're fucked up in some kind of way: last year 13% of Canadians sought services of mental health professionals. That doesn't include those that aren't getting help for their conditions.
Now is as good of a time to start developing this. All you have to do is just stick with a single task and complete it. Then do this over and over again and it will turn into a habit.
It's interesting that you "have tons and tons of ideas for mobile apps, web applications" but don't see them through to completion.
I'm the opposite: few worthwhile ideas but consistently finish the side projects I start, however minor -- I don't allow myself to start a new one until I've finished the last one.
Maybe you all shouldn't trade positions but contact info.
In my experience, I'm much more productive if I'm collaborating or otherwise have obligations to someone. It sounds like the OP needs some human interaction, which is often good for minimizing certain bad self-indulgent habits. For example I eat much healthier when my wife is around then when she's not, even if the meal is just for me.
